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The 4 Big Japanese Beach Essentials

Japanese Beaches

Summer is a wonderful season in Japan. It’s finally warm enough to peel off down parkas and ski gloves, it’s nice to relax in the park drinking beer, and the girls all wear short skirts. Actually, they wear those in winter too. What a country, seriously. Probably sucks to be a girl here though, having to walk by the park all winter long being ogled by some white guy in a parka drinking beer with ski gloves. If anybody asked, I figured I’d just say I was a member of the ski patrol, although sadly no one ever did. Continue reading “The 4 Big Japanese Beach Essentials”

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How Japan Made me Gay

I have Japan to thank for making me gay.  I’m pretty sure it did anyway, since it’s fairly dessicated my mojo.  I keep checking the mirror to make sure, and while I don’t look a whole lot gayer than before, the evidence is certainly mounting.  Like I woke up this morning, and instead of my usual manly breakfast of cold pizza, eggs, and coffee, I had yogurt.  Fruit yogurt.  Now, to be fair, Japan does have some really amazing flavors, like aloe yogurt, fig yogurt, mango . . . Ah jeez, I’m just glad my uncles aren’t around to see what I’ve become. Thank God they all passed away from a lifetime of bourbon and Lucky Strikes. Continue reading “How Japan Made me Gay”