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Dating Japanese Women, Explained

When Jasmine over at Zooming Japan asked me to write about dating Japanese women, my first thought was, “Ain’t no way Ken Seeroi’s touching that one.” In case you haven’t noticed, people are majorly opinionated about Their Japan. And not just Japanese folks either; I mean foreigners. Like if I said, “Japanese architecture is stunning,”...
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Who Wears the Pants in Japan?

“Ken? Ken! Wake the hell up! Meet me at the station.” I sat up in bed, and realized it was not my bed. Words like this are why Ken Seeroi does not answer his iPhone after 11 p.m. The dreaded Yoko was on the line, and I was in her bed. Well, at least she...
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Is Japan Safe? Not Quite…

The Importance of Knowing What to be Afraid of One of the things I like best about Japan is that it’s so incredibly safe. I mean, sort of. Like, you can stumble half crocked up to the ATM at midnight, take out a couple hundred buck’s worth of yen, and then float your way to...
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Four New Rules for Running in Japan

Japan’s a reasonably good place to head out for a little exercise, assuming you’re into that sort of thing. I personally enjoy indulging in “the fitness” myself, as I’ve found that it burns off potato chips while simultaneously making beer taste all that much better afterwards. So that’s a win-win. At the same time, I...
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Japan Wins Every Sport in Winter Olympics

Last week, I ate school lunch in the staff room, sitting at a table with plates full of mini omelets, rice, daikon salad, and some goo of tofu mixed with beans, which is rather redundant, if you think about it. Well, probably best not to think about it, actually. Plus a slice of orange for...
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Japanese Snack Bars and Some Tough Love

So here I am rushing home from my Japanese grocery store last month, and it’s dark out and I’m carrying bags and bags full rice and vegetables and seafood. This is all part of my new diet plan, whereby I eat healthily by schlepping home nutritious groceries, which also counts as exercise. So that’s a...
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Why I Hate the Internet

For some peculiar reason, the universe decided to stop functioning exactly two days ago. After my latest article about The Best Japanese Website, many people had trouble reaching this site, including me. It was like somebody kicked the plug out of the back of the internet, so that instead of being greeted with my unique...
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7 Famous Japanese Hangover Cures Reviewed

Christmas in Japan Christmas in Japan is a really big deal. Across the nation, Christmas trees are brimming with decorations, girls are dressed in sexy Santa outfits, and thousands of sparkling lights convey the warm message that the holidays are finally upon us and it’s now okay to forget all about that energy-conservation nonsense. If...
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Taking a Japanese Bus Tour. Rule #1: Beer Helps

So I went on this Japanese bus tour last weekend. I don’t really know why. Apparently Japanese people are wild about the bus for some reason, and so I figured eh, maybe it’d be cool. The whole thing started when my iPhone vibrated and The Tanuki was on the other end shouting in rough Japanese,...
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How to Make Japanese Curry

Whenever Japanese people ask what your favorite food is, do everyone a favor and don’t say “sushi.” Because sushi is what they think you’re going say. It’s what they want to hear. But that’s like a black guy saying his favorite food is fried chicken. Now it may be—-who doesn’t like fried chicken?—-but if you’re...
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