What I like the best is when I’m in line at the supermarket behind a woman with a kid. And the kid’s like six months old, not even vocal, yet already he knows. He’s just glaring at me, not even blinking, like, There’s something different about that dude—the eyes, the nose, the amazing fashion sense—what is it? And I’m like, uhh, the term you’re searching for is “gaijin.” Congratulations to me; I just beat out “mama” as your first word.
But the little guy keeps staring, like a midget superman trying to melt my eyeballs with his x-ray vision. I’m like, Jeez, lady, rein in your infant before he turns me into a pillar of salt.
Continue reading “Ken Seeroi Interview With the Author”
Ken Seeroi’s first book is finally here!
First of all, I want to thank all the readers of this blog for your consistent support over the years. Without your encouragement and, let’s be honest, incessant badgering, this work would’ve never been produced. It’s not that I’m lazy; I just can’t be bothered to get up before noon. That’s a legitimate medical condition–I submitted it to WebMD myself. Don’t hate on the disabled, is all I’m saying.
So what kind of book is it? is your first question. Glad you asked. Is it packed full of gritty, real-life stories about life, work, and sex in Japan, or just a hackneyed rehash of the same nonsense you’ve been reading here for a decade? Yeaaah, about that…
Continue reading “Japanese Rule of 7, the Book”
Occasionally, from tragedy, something new and magnificent is born into this world. Throughout the current worldwide crisis and raging meltdown, Seeroi Sensei stayed locked down and got busy, until the inevitable happened. And so it’s with great pleasure that I’m able to announce the delivery of Ken’s first.
Continue reading “A Happy Accident in Japan”
Sometimes what I like best about Japan is simply that it’s not the U.S. Not that I’m bagging on the land that invented deep-fried Snickers or anything. We all know it’s the greatest country on earth. Just ask any American.
Question those fine, flag-waving patriots about what they value most, and it won’t be long before someone belts out “freedom.” Because that’s the American way. Shouting. Loudness and freedom are baked into U.S. culture like apples to a pie. The Japanese response is necessarily softer, possessed as we are with the Spock-like ability to read each other’s minds. Here, that same question would be answered with “social responsibility,” or perhaps “the righteous thrill of blaming others.” Nyeh, same thing.
Continue reading “Social Responsibility in Japan”
Yep, nothing like a pandemic to test one’s commitment to a cause. And until a couple months ago, I was largely settled on the idea of living in Japan forever. I appreciate all aspects of this country, from the mountains to the oceans, and all the convenience stores in between. Japan’s a wondrous neon land of late-night karaoke, bullet trains, and spotless neighborhoods, maintained by an upstanding citizenry steadfastly dumping broken stereos and microwaves into the forest. Gotta admire the conscientiousness. I like everything about Japan except the people.
And of course, there were the ladies. Chatting up random birds in bars, restaurants, the Unemployment Bureau. “Come here often for government assistance? Me too. We’ve so much in common. Let’s hang out.” They say working on a hobby keeps your brain healthy, and you know Ken Seeroi ain’t trying to get no Alzheimer’s.
Continue reading “Enduring Japan During the Crisis”